Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday!

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Chapter 4: Comings & Goings

It’s been a month since Angel left me. I suppose its getting better. This damn bus reminds me so much of her. All the places we made love, cuddled or just looked into each others eyes. I hate this damn bus now when I used to love it so much. I can remember the exact day I began to hate it.

“Ash, we’re in the tabloids again!” Angel yelled as she paced back and forth on the moving bus.

“Angel, I’m in it every week. What do you expect?” Ashley answered distractedly as she painted her fingernails blood red. She was used to being written about in the papers and on the internet. It was usually only ninety-five percent untrue.

 Angel hadn’t warm to it at all. “They’re saying we’re a couple, Ashley. That doesn’t concern you?”

“No, I’m openly gay, why would I care? And we are like a couple so what does it matter?”

“We’re not a couple!”

That got her attention. “What?”

“They can’t think that!” Angel amended.

“No, you just said we not a couple,” Ashley barked.

“We are. You know that, but no one else can.”

“Why? It’s been weeks now, Angel.” Ashley was wondering why they were still hiding their relationship, but she didn’t want to rush. She figured she’d let Angel broach the subject when she was ready. After almost three months that didn’t seem to be happening and Ashley’s worry was not the least bit assuaged.

“I know that, but this,” she waved the tabloid in the air, “is not the way I want to come out the closet.” She finally plopped down onto a near by seat. “I’m not even sure I want to come out.”

Ashley stared at her in disbelief. “So what, this means nothing?”

“No, Ashley it means everything.” Angel softened. “But I…I like things the way they are with us, private. It’s more intimate that way.” She walked the short distance to sit down next to the pouting rock star. “You mean the world to me. Please tell me you understand.”

Ashley took one look into those hazel eyes and caved. “Not much longer?”

From there Angel went on to tell her she would be open about their relationship soon. Ashley introduced her to Jay so he could act as a beard until Angel was ready to come out of the closet. Unfortunately, the “phony” relationship Angel was in with Jay wouldn’t remain so for long.

6 months later.

“Angel, what’s wrong, sweetie? Why are you crying? You’ve been really emotional lately.”

The red head looked into big brown eyes hoping to find sympathy.

“I…I need to tell you something.”

“Alright, but stop crying first. It can’t be that bad,” she assured as she pushed the bangs away from Angel’s face.

Angel took a deep breath before saying, “I’m pregnant.”

Angel never got to see sympathy in Ashley’s eyes that day. She did see pain, confusion and anger. Those would be the emotions she would see in her eyes until she left.

Ashley tried her hardest to forgive Angel and move on, but she hadn’t been strong enough. It remained that way until Angel was too pregnant to tour anymore and Ashley couldn’t take the sight of her any longer.

I loved her more than anything. There was never a time I’d been so torn up in my life. I was baffled at how I could love and hate someone at the same time.

But I did and it doesn’t seem that it will ever change.


“So how long are you going to be gone?” Spencer asked as she munched on some popcorn and absentmindedly flipped through channels.  She was still amazed at how many channels the TVs on their bus could pick up.

“Only two days. I’ll meet you guys in Atlanta,” Madison returned while she looked through some papers.

“I didn’t know you left the tour so often. Aren’t personal assistants supposed to be around all the time?”

“I am around all the time. Besides I’m less of a PA and more of a business manager. I just respond to her every beckoned call on top of keeping her life in order,” she replied with an eye roll.


Madison stopped what she was doing to join Spencer on the couch. “Are you going to miss me?” she asked, her voice finding a seductive timber.

Spencer tore her eyes away from the screen to look at Madison as she began to slide slowly toward her on the couch. “Maybe.”

“Maybe?” Madison pouted. “All I get is a maybe?”

Spencer smiled as Madison continued to get closer. “Yep.” She laughed aloud as Madison got dangerously close to her neck.

“I suggest you change your tone missy.”

“Yeah, or what?”

“Or this,” she said as she attacked Spencer’s neck with nips and kisses making her squeal and wiggle.

Spencer and Madison’s bonding time would be short lived as the entire glam squad set about preening over Ashley. After clothes and hair it was time for make-up.

As usual Spencer leaned in close as she worked. Ashley was starting to enjoy this part of her regiment the most. She could smell Spencer’s perfume and feel her breath on her face. Little did she know that this was Spencer’s favorite part as well. She got to see Ashley at peace. She would sometimes speak to Libby or Simon, but she found that all conversation would end when she got close to Ashley. She could really take her time and admire her beauty without anyone suspecting anything more.

All too soon for both of them it was over and Ashley needed to get off to her next show. Ashley opened her eyes and inspected herself in the mirror.

“Spencer, I asked for red lips tonight.”

“They are red.”

“Not red enough.”

“Not red enough? Anymore and your going to look like your bleeding.”

“I didn’t ask for you to approve the level of red. I just said as red as possible,” she demanded.

“They can’t be anymore red, Ashley, you’ll look crazy.”

“I didn’t hire you to tell me your opinion, I hired you to do what I say!”
“Actually RockRite hired me and my job is to keep you looking good!” Spencer yelled getting equally as frustrated. “I made you look good in spite of the bags under yours eyes from being up all hours of the night, the pale skin from the lack of nutrition you’ve been getting and I covered up the bite mark some floozy left on your neck! I’ve kept you looking good for a month now, what makes you think I’m going to let you go out looking anything but amazing now?”

Ashley was taken aback by Spencer’s anger. What surprised her most was the fact that she would go toe to toe with her like this. Simon and Libby never dared raise their voice at her and though Madison would argue, she seldom raised her voice. Second, she was shocked at how much attention Spencer actually paid. Her eating habits, sleeping habits, or lack there of, and her mating habits too apparently.

Despite her surprise, she certainly wasn’t going to back down now. “Why do you have to be so difficult all the time?” Ashley shot back.

“I’m difficult? You have to be kidding. Let me tell you…”

“Hey, hey, hey!” Madison interrupted as she entered the room. “What are you two fighting about now?

“She wants Bozo lip—” Spencer started.

“I told her—” Ashley began simultaneously.

“Hush! I don’t care what it is. It’s been a month now and you two still can’t get along. I have to be away for forty-eight hours, I’d like to know you two won’t kill each other while I’m gone.” Madison looked back and forth between the two women that were now standing on either said of the make-up chair. “No, I need you both to promise me you will at least try to get along while I’m gone. I need to know everything won’t fall apart as soon as I step out the door.”

Madison was greeted with silence causing her to place her hands on her hips and roll her neck as she bore holes into each of them with her eyes. “Spencer?”

“I’ll try, Madison,” Spencer huffed.


“Whatever, me too.”

“Thank you. Now, Spencer honey, come see me out. Ashley, I’ll see you on Thursday.” Madison turned to walk away shooting a hard glance in Libby and Simon’s direction. “And you two just sit there and let them fight. Freakin’ useless I swear…”

Soon after Madison and Spencer took their exit Ashley left the hotel room and started toward her own. As she turned down the hall she noticed a man leaning against her door.

“Great another damn fan slipped through,” she thought to herself. “I really need to up my security.”

“I think you found the wrong room, guy,” she said from behind him.

“That attitude tells me I’m in the right place,” he replied, his back still turned.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me,” he said before turning to face her.

“Aiden!” she squealed as she jumped up into his arms. He willingly scooped her up and hugged her tightly. “What are you doing here?”

“A little birdie told me you were in the area and the team had a game not far away, so I thought I’d give you a shout.”


“Who else?”

“I’m glad she did, I’m so happy to see you,” Ashley beamed. “How’s the team doing?”

“Semi-finals, baby!” he said with a fist pump.


Aiden spotted Spencer as she exited the elevator and passed the pair on her way to her room. She and Ashley scowled to each other as she disappeared down the hall.

“Who’s the hottie?”

“Ugh, that’s my new make-up artist.”

“Oh right. She’s a pants tighten-er.”

“Sorry, bro, someone’s got dibs,” she said as she swiped her key card and opened the door.

“Oh man. Who?”


“What? The suit?” he asked in shock.

“I know, hard to believe, right?”

“Most definitely. You get her yet?”

Ashley laughed. “I said she was taken, Aid. And she’s really not my type.”

“When has that ever meant anything to you?”

She was pensive for a moment. “Um…never.”

“Exactly. You have to admit she’s a cutie.”

“Yeah she is,” Ashley conceded, her tone serious. “But she’s not like my other girls. We fight all the time. She’s such a pain.”

“I’d like her to inflict pain on me any day.”


Aiden went silent grabbing a seat next to Ashley on the bed. “Speaking of pain…I heard Libby left.”

Ashley turned away from him trying to keep her emotions under control at the mention of that name.

“We don’t have to talk about it, Ash. I just wanted you to know I heard and I’m here for you.”

She turned back to face him with water in her eyes. All she could do I nod her appreciation.

“So enough of this mushy stuff. How ‘bout I take my oldest friend out on the town?” she deflected as she stood to her feet.

“Cool, I’d like that.”

“I have a few backstage passes for tonight’s show too, so you can bring whomever you want. We can all head out after. Sound good?”

“Sounds great.”